I tried to find some kind of quarantine calendar, they were either something so structured or of such dark humor that I just decided to put up some good color, not sure when, where or how I took this picture. It seems fitting that is almost how I feel about everything right now.
It is Tuesday, I lost Monday - it started out lovely, did morning meditation, did my immunity boosting tai chi and then there was just a series of little things. Made grocery list, did some dishes, had several phone calls, and did a load of laundry. I was just off, on one phone call I felt like I was a little crabby, not very able to listen well and it just felt like we weren't connecting as well as usual. I also tried a new recipe, it took some concentration and there were a number of steps. Not the best choice on a day when I was clearly less than grounded with myself.
I remembered that in first self-isolation 14 days, it was at that half-way point that I was more on edge. I was feeling every ache and pain, imagining my hurting joints, and took my temperature several times after having it be a little elevated 98.2 --- I am a in the 97's type of person. I felt tired. I realized that I just needed to go take a nap.
Before that I did a little breathing meditation. Trying of trying to just be present in myself. It helped, off to bed. I spent some time reading a new book on my kindle, it was engaging and somewhat mindless reading - perfect. I was able to go to sleep and I awoke feeling more rested, less scared and more ready to just carry on.
The soup I made was good, Greek Egg-Lemon Soup. My book was a good "buddy" for the day. I watched the PBS Newshour at 7 pm.
The news is not heartening. I do want to know to be able to process what is happening with this virus. What is happening in our world.
I slept for a couple of hours, then was wide awake, maybe it was the late afternoon nap, the news, the middle of my self-isolation - I finished reading my book. I started another. I had a zoom call at 9 a.m. it seemed to close, and finally sleep. I woke up and realized that I totally spaced out blogging on Monday.
Today, more mindful. Be present, eat good food, and rest. Realizing I need to rest, lay down even if I don't feel tired. The weight of the pandemic is real. I have not had a hug or any physical human contact since March 28th. In Phoenix, I had my friends, I had hugs, I had Abbie my doggie friend. I could talk to the cats.
I took a break from typing for a moment right now, I closed my eyes, I envisioned walking with friends, arms around each other. Holding hands, I love holding hands. It was good enough. I could feel the touch. We are all in this together.
It is Tuesday. Day 10 and I am counting. There is nothing more on my calendar today. The blog is done.
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