MaryAlice Musings and More

I had a good sleep last night, and I woke up at 6 this morning and after a little while went back to sleep until 9:30!  The tiredness that I felt is slowly leaving my body.  I am settling back into home.   I did less today than yesterday.   I did not turn on the tv or radio until after noon, then turned it off pretty quickly.   I have made a few calls, responded to a few emails, and sent a couple of texts.   I am aware that I have many feelings, they are almost overflowing - the fear that fueled my adrenaline that helped to get me home is lessening.  Not that I am not holding a big bucket of fear for myself, my family, our country, the world but it is not a fear that is searing through my veins and helped to keep me on hyper alert.   This deeper more compassionate fear is one that I can sit with, one that will help to move me in "right direction"  for now it is keeping me home,  it is going to help me figure out h...

It is noon (eastern daylight time)  I have cleaned out the refrigerator,  talked with a friend so worried about her son and if/when he will get back to Maine, I called in my grocery order and Brandie did my shopping, Matt picked up my mail and the groceries.   What a morning. The snow is still falling.  It is beautiful.  March is ending with a few things being the same as the beginning - snow on the ground.  March is ending in ways that were unimaginable at the beginning of the month.   I am slowly slowly decompressing from my travels, from my need to make decisions, from my worry about Myah returning from Spain,  from my daughter returning to the hospital to work,  to Luke who is having a senior year in high school like no one who is alive today, and to James who continues to protect and to lead his tribe as the captain of the tribal police force.   I am humbled and so fiercely aware that we all have to do the rig...

I hardly have words.  I have been home for five hours.   I have slept for about two hours.   I am know having a cup of my favorite tea,  brewed in my teapot - I woke up with a splitting headache and realized that I had not had any caffeine in almost twenty-four hours.  I have looked at a few pieces of mail.  I have put the food away (and yes I am doing all the right, safe things) and have left the suitcases for later.     The trip back to home seems like it started days and days ago.  Should I leave Arizona, what is happening with this pandemic,  where will I be safe?  These questions and many more were omnipresent at times, way in the background at others, the question loomed  when and how to I get back home.    I have been in isolation since March 10th,  my grandson's birthday.  I am well.   I was very cautious and during those first days in Phoenix it was a push/pul...

SHIN BROOK FALLS  I am sitting in the living room in Gilbert, Arizona.  I have a heat pack on my neck, trying to coax the big "crick" in my neck to loosen up before I get on the plane tonight.   We have had a very quiet day,  I have tried to rest some so that I can get myself home.   People from home are reaching out.  I am getting well wishes.  Bags are packed and in the garage ready to be put in the car.  The boxes I was sending back got mailed yesterday.  I have my snacks, a sandwich, cheese and dried fruit ready in case I am hungry and there is nothing open when I land in Philadelphia.   I have a friend who flew through there a little over a week ago and nothing was open, the airport deserted.  I am fine with that, just need the folks at my gate to get me on the plane.   I can tell that I am moving into my transition mode.  I am hunkering down in another kind of way, going inside.  Breathing in,...

Photo taken 3/25/20 by "Skye" Bloodgood  - Tucson AZ Today has been and up and down day.  Just when we sent the boxes off to be shipped back home, I got an email saying my flight was cancelled.  I had a minor meltdown.  Then called American,  I am on the same flight to Philadelphia (the "red eye") Friday night, but will have to be in Philadelphia airport for 3 hrs.  awaiting my next flight.  I get into Bangor shortly after noon on Saturday.  Not the end of the world but the change did illuminate how short my rope is right now.     I hope no more changes.  I can feel the anxiety and I am just breathing through each little wave as it rises up.   I am imagining myself in beautiful bubble, safe secure, waltzing through TSA, and then wrapped in a warm and comfortable cocoon for the final flight to Bangor in the little plane.   Most of the packing is done.  I am checking in with people, they are che...

I have hearing aids,  I got them the first part of February.  I drove in a snowstorm to pick them up, and the roads weren't any better when I went for my two-week "check-up".  I was losing my high frequencies - and what tipped the scale for me was in listening to Chris (my audiologist) assure me that I would be able to hear the birds. Oh of the most lovely parts of each day I have had in Arizona, has been the birds,  they wake me in the morning,  they sing all day longs,  some are really really persistent, I still hear a few as I prepare for bed at night.  I have even taken a few pictures and Anita has instantly identified the bird for me.  As I type I can hear at least four different types of calls.  I am watching some very small bird sitting in the lemon tree next door.  The birds don't know there is a pandemic.  I bet they are liking that there are not so many cars,  fewer planes, and less air pollution.  They make ...

I found on Sunday and Monday that I just could not focus or did not have an idea of what I would say in my blog.  On Sunday, I decided that I would take a break day, and yesterday it just didn't happen. What did happen yesterday is that I made a final decision.  I was going to return home this week.  So after placing my call to American Airlines, waiting for a call back,  having to talk with a supervisor because they were going to charge me a change fee, I was able to make a reservation to return to Maine no extra charges. I will be on a plane at 6 a.m. Saturday (unless outside forces intervene-imagine that).  I will be spending the rest of this week, getting myself ready,  doing some cooking to put in Cindy's freezer and enjoying these last days of Arizona sun and warmth.     I have people that are driving my car to the airport, so I can safely drive myself home.  I have ordered my misfits box weekly.  I have a few gr...

Governor Cuomo: "My last point is practice humanity. We don't talk about practicing humanity, but now if ever there is a time to practice humanity the time is now. The time is now to show some kindness, to show some compassion to people, show some gentility - even as a New Yorker." Cuomo: "Yes, we can be tough. Yes, this is a dense environment. It can be a difficult environment. It can also be the most supportive, courageous community that you have ever seen that is why I am proud to be a New Yorker and to be Governor of this great state."   Walking in Gilbert, AZ - Shadow Catching   I wanted to start my blog today with Governor Cuomo's ending to his press conference this morning,  I did not hear it live, I amazingly and happily slept in this morning, but later I went on line after several people commented about his amazing leadership during this time.  I had earlier in the morning reread a journal article written by Dr. Richard ...

It was balance that I most sought today.  I woke up at 8 am after sleeping 7 hours without waking up, heavenly.  Had dreams about caravans, a long bus and a tiny lovable pod lots of activity.  The pictures below are no dream,  or rather a dream for the awakened eye.    After a leisurely morning we got in the car at noon today (3 pm EDT, 2 pm CDT) and headed out to Superstition Mountain.  We went to Lost Dutchman State Park (named after a story of a lost goldmine - you can google it!).    Keep on reading after you enjoy the pics:  We took a long walk in the State Park,  there were quite a few people there,  Cindy said more than she had ever seen there.  At times it was a little stressful, as the range of respecting social distancing remains wide.  There was one jolting experience as we stood off to the side of the trail and a mother and her two teenage daughters walked by,  one w...

What a day.  What a day. What a day.  Breathe In ------- Breathe Out.   Breathe In.......Breathe Out.    I have just stepped out of the shower, where I basked myself in the clean warm water.  Water washing away,  water enveloping me in a prayer,  water cleansing away my worries and fears.   I put on my earrings, a beautiful scarf,  my fun colorful flip flops, and a favorite shirt.   As I sat down to write today's blog,  I noticed that I had a comment from yesterday's post,  it was a hug meditation.  That hug, that love,  that connection could not have been better timed.  I just held myself in that hug.  I will do another big hug when I am through writing today's blog I am going to hold myself once again - a long long deeply felt hug.   We need our hugs right now.  I am sending out a full body open armed belly touching hug to us all.   That hug, that intention shifted what ...

Today is a double header it was not really intentional that I took a blog day off yesterday, it just happened, once I realized I had not sat down to write it was so late on the east coast I decided to just wait until today. Sicily   I wanted to post a picture from my trip to Sicily.  There were many to pick from and somehow this amazingly beautiful ruin captures the moment.  I have a very good friend who lives in Syracuse,  she is well,  the south of Italy has not yet been hit in the way the north of Italy has been.  She was not planning to return to Wisconsin until early May, and now understands she does not know for sure when she will be able to return.   Life as we knew it last month is changing and today was the first day that I really felt like I have achieved a little more balance, lots less time with the television on, and more time doing things that ground me - more tai chi/qi gong, knitting and I am still cooking cooking cooking......

Well, Day 15 was filled with Myah's movement from Spain to Minnesota.  My FB feed was filled with my posts and friends well wishes, and late last night.  Myah, her luggage and her family were all safely home.   Day 16 is Sasha's birthday.  Luke is home - no school until an undetermined date, he is a senior in high school.  James who is the Captain of the Prairie Island Tribal Police force is moving into a crisis planning mode,  Myah is home from Spain and will start her on-line classes of her coursework from the Univerisad of Granada on March 23rd, and Sasha has now been furloughed from work for two weeks, she is a pediatric nurse working at the University of Minnesota Hospital.  Because Myah is home from Spain, Sasha cannot return to the hospital until the quarantine period is over.   I am in Gilbert, and Cindy and I are finding our rhythms and enjoying our time together.  The Phoenix area is behind the curve, but a major met...

I thought that this was a good reminder for me today.  My day started with another set of challenges for my grand daughters return from Spain.  Her bus to Madrid was cancelled for 1 a.m. on Monday.  So at 6 a.m. this morning Central Daylight Time, Sasha and James headed to the airport so the Sasha could once again get Myah's airline ticket changed.  The good news is it happened and Myah will be on the plane from Madrid to JFK (we so so hope that this will be true) at midnight in Arizona.  As I am typing she and her roommate Callie are sleeping in their hotel next to the airport in Madrid.  Now it is just getting her all the way to Minnesota.  We most certainly hope so.   Today has been a most wonderful day in Arizona.  There have been blue skies and sunshine all day long.  I had a wonderful breakfast at the Desert Oasis with my friends, and then made the transition from Central Phoenix to Gilbert, AZ a first ring suburb.  ...