MaryAlice Musings and More

The late afternoon started with my grandchildren, we went to our most favorite japanese bistro and sat at the sushi bar, and were happy, contented appreciative enjoyers of every dish that was sat in front of us!  I love that their favorite neighborhood restaurant when at Gramma's is the sushi/noodle bistro.  They especially love the rabato.  Then we were off to our friends Thai restaurant where we had sticky rice and ice cream, and folded peace cranes!  The place was packed with families - kids running around, the owners smiling, the wait staff running, everyone making cranes, toasting the new year.  We had thai fortune cookies - my said that I was going to be successful in bed - what an omen for the new year! Now it is time and space for intention.  I would like to share the peace prayer from the sufi order.  We in the U.S. and in a number of other countries will all be praying sometime tonight or tomorrow.  I hope that in whatever way you can and do - that you will take a moment ...

I love that we honor artists, and artists who are alive! The Kennedy Center is a great place, I have been there, and it is beautiful.  One of these moments when television is at its best.  Such a good way to end the year.  We are so fortunate to have the arts in our lives.  It is such a vital part of my passion and my soul.  

Matthew Rothschild of The Progressive penned his musings about Reverend Warren on December 20th...it took me awhile to go to the Progressive Magazine site - the article and the comments are forthright. I liked the suggestion that women and women and men and men just kiss their way through the inauguration. Wonder if I will get any takers? Let's hope that we can have better appointments where it really matters about Gay Rights, Abortion, and other "social" issues! So I still have to rant a little more about this --- I would have like to have Thich Nhat Hanh give the invocation. I have selected one of his sayings, it is about love for self, somehow having two days of expressing my dismay and express my hopes is about loving self. So here is a zen wish for all of us from Thich Nhat Hahn: Love is the capacity to take care, to protect, to nourish. If you are not capable of generating that kind of energy toward yourself – if you are not capable of taking care of yours...

The New York Times in the opinion page ran a good article on Obama's choice of the Rev. Rick Warren to give the invocation at the most historical of inaugurations since the 1st one!   You're Likable Enough ...by Frank Rich is reasoned and asks what many of us are,  why is Obama spending political capitol on this.  Isn't there another way to bring a group of people who don't see eye to eye to the table.  As a lesbian, a "gay" woman, who came to my understanding of being gay much more through my feminist political vantage points, than my understanding of gay history.  Of course that was 33+ years ago, and Harvey Milk is not a historical abstraction but a never forgotten hero,  as was Del Lyon.  I once went to a Daughters of Bilitis meeting, and felt like I was in the midst of courageous, tireless women who loved women, and I was.     The Reverend that suggest because I am a woman who loves women I am equal to and being a child abuser.  This is what the Reverend ...

Three generations trundled off to the Guthrie this afternoon to see the Christmas Carol.  Sasha was around the age of Myah when we first went to the Guthrie to see the Christmas Carol. She gave the 4 minute cliff note of the play as we were driving to the theater.  Myah was struck by how horribly awesome Mr. Marley's ghost was, and giggled at the delight of the "old" Ebenezer watching scenes from Christmas's past.  Luke like the traveling in space of the 2nd ghost of Christmas - he thought it was a cool dude who was in the sled.  Sasha sang silently along with the music.  At the end, the man in the row in front of us, thanked Myah for her giggles, and said that it made the play even better.  I loved the scenes that pulled at your heart, and delighted in my child and grandchildren sitting with me.  Sasha thought the Guthrie was a good place for a sexy date,  I told her I would remember that when I was planning one!  The grandkids loved the play, and we decided next yea...

The grand kids are in bed,  Mom and Dad are finishing up the last tasks of this christmas eve night.  Luke and Myah had their first needle felting lessons and made wonderful ornaments that are hanging on the tree.  They are proud and pleased with their bells, stars, gingerbread men, and quarter moon.  They are beautiful.  A gift for christmas eve.  At bedtime we all snuggled in the "Mom and Dad's bed, and listened while my daughter, their Mom read the "Polar Express" and "The Night Before Christmas".  All listening and enjoying the pictures.  For me, a precious moment,  I remember my daughter their Mom being snuggled in my arms on christmas eve reading, being so excited about this day of receiving of giving.  Earlier in the night Luke and Myah got to pick one gift,  Sasha was able to do that,  the one gift on christmas eve.  They picked their boxes, and are happily sleeping in their snuggly new pj's.   I am getting ready to sleep in the old memories, th...

Shhhh, don't disturb the light.  The candle light is moving, slowly reaching upwards.  The flames are whispering to each other.  Recognizing, witnessing each others vibrations.  In the stillness the flames quietly light the altar, the walls, the room, my heart.  Honor the darkness that creates such a magnificent space for the light.

When I drove to work this morning it was below zero (real temperature) and the wind chill made it feel really worse!  It was crunchy cold.  The sun was brilliant in the sky.  Winter sun bright!  Big, big sun, lots of vapors in the air.  Big cold. Big Light.  Then all of sudden there is this rainbow in the sky --- well it's not a rainbow, it's a sun dog.  An amazing full, amazing colored sun dog rainbow in the frigid morning.  It was beautiful...the sky was twinkling, sizzling, radiating.  That hot hot sun so far away, the artic cold and whatever combination that needs to occur did.  A big gift on the first day of winter.  A sweet way to be rewarded on the way to work.  Fire, ice, sun dogs, and winter.  The solstice light of the evening before turned into the radiant beauty of the dawn.  Just like the poem, cherishing the light of the morning dawn.

Just Delicate Needles Its so delicate, the light. And there's no little of it.  The dark is huge. Just delicate needles, the light, in an endless night. And it has such a long way to go through such desolate space. So let's be gentle with it. Cherish it. So it will come again in the morning. We hope. Rolf Jacobsen Translated by Robert Hedin Copper Canyon Press

My house is filled with candles,  I have some fun round color bulbs of all different colors, and I have spent the evening, sitting quietly in the dark with my candle light!  Reading and rereading Just Delicate Needles, cherishing the light.  I am also baking, bringing cookies to work tomorrow and this year I am only making cookies that my Gramma and my Mother made -- tonight it was Winter Wedding Cakes, Date-Nut Rocks, and Nut Gems....my favorite are the gems,  My paper with recipe must be 35+ years old it has so many stains on it and it is time to share: Nut Gems   2 1/2 Dozen 2 c. sifted flour 1 c. butter 4 T. powdered sugar 1 c. chopped nuts  2 T. water 2 t. vanilla powdered sugar Cream butter (or oleo), add sugar gradually, cream until smooth.  Blend in flour.  Stir in nuts, water, flavor (vanilla).  Mix well.  Shape into 1" balls, bake on ungreased cookie sheet in oven 350*, 20 minutes or until golden brown (usually takes longer).  While still warm roll in powdered sugar.   E...

Our Governor told the state how he was going to take around 140 million out of the current year state budget today.  Ouch.  Local government aid cuts,  counties that thought they knew what their check from the state would be next week - surprise it's less, lots less.  The state is adjusting their budget and everyone else should to - that's the message!  Hard realities and lots of opportunities to dig within self and examining what about adjustments.  As I left work today I kept thinking of President-Elect Obama and his message of change.  There is one thing I am certain about change -- it means that change has to happen -- not just change for someone else, but change that effects me.  So here's to the adventure of change.  The reality, the possibility and so much more.

Minnesota is still without a Senator for the new Congress that convenes in January.  Today the tireless and brave State Canvassing Board is still counting contested ballots - they did the Franken pile and Coleman was up by 350+ votes I just don't remember the exact count,  then they started on the Coleman contested pile and NOW Coleman is ahead by 5 (FIVE) votes.  The Supreme Court has sent the contested absentee ballots back to the campaigns, the secretary of state, and the state canvassing board and told them to figure out a process to sort out which ballots should be included in the recount,  there may be another election before this is settled.  And the worst of it all -  there is not a shard of equanimity with either campaign.  The calls and emails for money continue.  The lawyers are on the TV everyday, I did laugh about the ballot that had the "oval" filled in for Franken and then the voter decided to make a statement on the line "only because he is a democrat...

I just returned home from a wonderful dinner and such deep diving into being present.  What a gift to have friends that want to share and be able to listen and be present to this very moment.  It is so full -- that moment of listening of just being with another being  -- what a gift.  Today was a full plate day,  lots of signing documents, doing reviews, checking in ..... trying to do the stuff that needs to get done before the end of the year.  People were glad the the "nuisance" snow had stopped, that it didn't take them as long to get into work, as it took the night before for them to get home.  There is a little cheer despite all the "bad" news.  Driving home, I noticed more holiday lights.  I love the lights!  They are magical -  there is some part of being little that just has a safe place to come out when I am "captured" by the twinkling of the lights.  We are days away from the longest night,  we are in the dark, and yet I continue to pulled in...

2* and snowing, the plane left 1 1/2 hrs. late from Nashville, due to the weather in Minneapolis.  How funny to be so ready to get on a plane and come home to weather that is just mean for December 16th, and most people would think it was mean anytime!  But happy I was when we actually knew we were going to be able to fly home tonite!  It is cold and windy and wintry and I am glad to be back home.  I sat next to a new Dad, Sam is 10 weeks old and he couldn't wait until we were high enough in the sky to show me the pictures on the computer.  This was his first business trip since the Sam was born, and he couldn't wait to get home, he kept apologizing, saying well of course I want to see my wife, but he couldn't contain his joy!  I have been practicing being open for conversation on plane rides, and the connections I had both coming and going from Nashville were great.  Open hearted, interested, good story telling and listening, it made the sometimes boring flight so full and...

I was at the Grand Ole Opry on Saturday! I didn't see the show, but toured the auditorium, listened to some music, remembered how important it is to have something to count upon. Tennessee and Minnesota have something in common -- a long time radio show. Garrison Keillor has said that his listening to the Grand Ole Opry shaped his own dreaming about Prairie Home Companion. Prairie Home Companion has been a part of my weekend since I was a young young woman living in the hills of southwest Wisconsin. We didn't have a TV and public radio was my lifeline --- it still is, and I have several tv's. Luke (my grandson) and Sasha (my daughter) were riding in the car on Sunday -- PHC was on the radio --- Luke told his Mom that Gramma was taking him to the radio show when he was a little bigger, he was wondering if the start of the new year would be "a little bigger", "Yes" Mom said, and she told Luke about how she went with her Mom to see PHC. These are th...

What a week, Minnesota is reeling.  The budget deficit continue to grow.  The Senate election recount is still going,  ballots (with the exception of mail in ballots) have all been counted, well except the 133 ballots they can't find in Minneapolis...the State canvassing board met today and they start slogging through the 4000+ contested ballots.  Headlines in the paper about the staff at nursing home abusing residents with dementia...I am reading a book "Trauma Stewardship" which is about the deep authentic layers of caring for ourselves when effected by secondary trauma, burnout.   People think that the folks who work in state government are out of touch way removed, but I watch people everyday who feel very responsible if in any way the system fails a person.  All of us have to sort out, to understand how we best can center, nurture, process and not have the abuses, shortcomings and neglect of our systems incapacitate us.  It has been a hard week, a great desire to tra...

I had been feeling pretty good lately about having my home state be the home of our soon to be president.  I mean Mayor Daly #1 was the mayor the entire time of my childhood and when I moved to the city of Chicago proper as a young adult he was still Mayor!  I have felt that people had warmed up to Chicago lately, but mostly just forgot that it was a big city.  I was feeling proud to be from Illinois and then it all comes roaring back, corruption, dead people voting, etc.  This Governor with a name that I cannot pronounce or remember has taken the cake - or at least tried to have his cake and more too!  I would laugh if it wasn't so sad - and such an example of where we are in American politics, why not just take the highest bidder!  Isn't that was capitalism is all about?  We sure are keeping our federal agents busy, with Governor's selling senate seats,  now even in squeaky clean MN they are trying to figure out if our honorable sr. senator was involved in his wife being ...

My grandchildren are both readers,  they are 6 and 8 years old, and they are still so amazed and proud and captivated by waht they can do: read, and the amazing stories and information they learn when they read.  They are reading chapter books and starting to move beyond the "readers" and just picking up a book and reading it!  We are reading the Narnia Chronicles.   They read to each other, and still love to have Mom, Dad, or Gramma read them a story. I went to my local bookstore tonight to find some new books for my youngest reader!  I had already got bought books for the biggest of my readers - sitting in the kids room was a very big kid (almost teen!) her Mom works in the store, and as her Mom showed me some of the choices, she turned to her daughter and asked if she remembered the series.  At first she feigned disinterest, but as I started laying out the books, I asked her if she remembered a specific book --- she leapt out of her chair and started telling me things abou...

Tonight I finished one of my "green rugs"  it is made from old t-shirts, you cut a continuous strip starting from the bottom 1/2 " or so, and just keep cutting until you get to the arm pits.  Then you have one ball of t-shirt, and a rag.  It takes about 6 t's to make a rug.  You use jumbo needles 17's and knit back and forth, and you have a rug.  Then you sew a bias tape around the edge and it is great feeling for your feet, looks good, and amazing recycling.  I am giving them as presents!  I also have been making mix it up scarves...taking various left over yarns and making crazy strips of color and texture.  Fun and you can stay warm,  and I am making felt bowls and now boxes....all of this is a way to have balance, be quiet find my center, listen and be so very appreciative of what I have done and how it gives me pleasure.  Simple things in life.  Knit, Knit, breathe, touch your soul.  Knit knit breathe feel the expansiveness.  Knit knit transformation.  Trans...

We are moving closer to the official first day of winter, here in MN we are as usual way ahead of schedule.  We have 1-2 inches of snow on the ground and it is a beautiful dry snow falling this morning.  There have been a number of accidents, people forget that they are diving on snow and it can be slick!  It is amazing that this happens every year seeing that we really have so few weeks when there is NOT snow on the ground.  The houses that I look at out from my "back yard" view are all white, as is my own, and it gives this consistent white background everywhere, the trees and bushes break up the whiteness that is everywhere.  I am feeling that going within pull as we move into winter.  The internal landscape whispers and entices me to pay attention.  I am felting, and knitting, and writing, and imagining!  Focus on my being vs. what I do.  We are moving towards the longest night, the light has diminished and the internal light burns eternally.

Stillwater is the town that is known as the birthplace of Minnesota,  it is right on the WI/MN border and the St. Croix River separates the two states here, and further south it is the Mississippi River.  Stillwater is old, and I am in staying the night in one of the oldest hotels, it is now called the Water Street Inn, it is on Water Street and a stones throw away from the lift bridge.  Yes it lifts up and it is old too!  We are having our annual retreat - a time away for all the staff who are working so hard to create a way in which people with disabilities can and do work.  That there is an expectation that people with disabilities get to plan about work,  they may not always choose to work, but people can make informed choice.  It is about full inclusion and not living in poverty and all the things that come from work.  I have found over the past 12 years that the only people that really joke about not working are people who work.  We have a mission in our work to increase competit...

On Saturday I felted four bowls,  they are all dry now and shaped, and I must say they are amazing vessels.  You can feel the good energy and vibrational attributes of the care and fun and prayerful energy that happens when I knit and shape and transform something from yarn to an object!  How fun to feel so good about the creative process. Then there is this crescent moon that keeps getting larger, the sky was so very clear tonight.  It is cold, the sun is low in the sky, and the lights of the city and the celestial sky all have a texture of winter to come.   Jupiter and Venus were on the horizon earlier tonight, the moon was no where anywhere near them.  So the shifts have occurred, the movement is noticeable even though the planets are so very far away.   I am glad that I could see Venus, Jupiter, and the crescent moon all shimmering so very close to each in this amazing triangle.  Now they are moving on, and I have been moved. May we each find that which moves, inspires, keeps us op...

So here's the best light show around.  Just look in the SouthWestern Sky - there is a conjunction or alignment of Venus and Jupiter with the moon in the southwestern sky -- it is most amazing during the early evening - and will be for the next couple of nights.  On Tuesday Venus will be eclipsed by the moon.  As the month continues Venus and Jupiter will continue to move apart.  Venus, Jupiter and Moon will not be this close again until 2052. Enjoy the celestial night sky.  Stop the car on the way home from work.  Go outside and check it out.  It is beautiful.  I pulled into my favorite look-out in between the cemetery and the highway - there is a high spot, and a little park.  You can see south and west and downtown Minneapolis always is a treat.  So I stopped tonight and just watched and marveled at our amazing universe.   It's a must see.  

I am amazed at what it feels like to be proud of our president to be, it feels like he is the president.  He is a leader and he is leading. I am happy that my friend Brendan is sober and getting the treatment he needs. I am glad for 911,  there was a big fight at my neighbors house.  It took me awhile to realize that what I was hearing was screams from my neighbor's house.  I called 911, as I was looking out the window -- two men were there to do some work on the house --- one was trying to push the other into the truck as he was screaming,  the woman on the 911 phone kept asking questions, and I told her what was happening.  She said she had gotten a number of calls the police and ambulance were on the way,  they arrived in seconds!  Thank you for good public service.  It was 14 years ago that I had a sudden asthma attack,  if I had not been in an ambulance I would have been dead.  They kept me alive when during complete pulmunary failure and cardiac shutdown!  Now that is somethi...

It has been a long time since I wrote about my sleep.  Yesterday was a big day,  lots of fun,  lots of food, long time being up, and to bed smiling and sighing!  I woke up at 1:30 a.m.  and went back to sleep in about 2 minutes, next wake up 6:30  very good for this post - surgical sleep apnea gal,  then I fell back to sleep again, and woke up after 8 a.m.  This was indication of tiredness, but also that my surgery in September has accomplished some of what was supposed to happen,  I can sleep longer uninterrupted, my sleep is of a better quality, and I breathe when I sleep.  I think all of those are happening, I go to have a sleep study in January, then back to the Dr. then we'll see what science says about my "condition".  So a simple thing to be thankful for breathing and sleeping!

How good to have this day - to just be reminded of what we are thankful for.  Myah, age 8 grand daughter this morning told me she was most thankful that I was making delicata squash,  then she said, "No,  the squash is third." I asked what was first? She said, " my family and second is that we are going to have really good food today."   She stopped and said, "not everyone has enough to eat".  So having food is something to be thankful for.  Yes it is, and we did.  I am really full, happy, thankful, tired and glad to have had my heart, my mind, my body feed and appreciated all day long.  May it happen every day - the thankfulness, appreciation, and moments of joy.

Big Noodle Little Noodle (sen yai sen lek) inspired from the Isaam region of Thailand.  It is the newest restaurant in NE Minneapolis - Thai in the NE how fun!  This family is creative, grounded, and gracious in their efforts to provide a wonderful community place to eat, drink, come together.  Every detail is simple and beautiful, the walls, the silk wall coverings (spun, designed, dyed and woven by an aunt in Thailand) great black and white photos, and oil paintings on silk.  And the food is great.  Kate, Kira, Emma, Sissie, Myah, Luke, Sasha and I all went to have some noodles, the kids get Izzie's ice cream for dessert!  The sticky rice was so good.  It was our pre-thanksgiving day dinner gathering early - the women who will cook together enjoying an evening of home cooked food not at home,  great attention, and really fun conversations!  Everyone was looking forward to a fun day - honoring family, honoring friendship, Luke and Emma wanting to share their reading skills with ea...

I just finished going through my recipe box that I started when I was 19 years old, that is 39 years ago!  I was looking for my families hardtack recipe.  This recipe started with my great grandmother (maybe earlier, but I can only verify that many generations!).  I am sure that it changed slightly through good and bad times but it is great!  I loved it as a kid, and my daughter loves it, and we have moved the recipe to yet another generation.  The best is the recipe I pulled out is written by my Mom,  she isn't here, but her paper, her act of writing the recipe for me is here.  And all the memories, it is a souvenir.   So you can have the recipe to, we made it only on holidays.  You can make the hardtack weeks ahead of time.  Then whip the cream and fold in the hardtack a few hours before dinner.  Some people think this is dessert, but it was always on the plate with all the other food, and then extra helpings later!  Yummm.  Hard Tack -  from the Washington Family 1 Cup packed br...

Jack and Jack - yesterday was the 45th anniversary of the of  C.S. Lewis and John F. Kennedy.  They both were called Jack by their families and friends early and throughout their lives.  I went to Shadowlands at the Guthrie on Saturday, I had not seen the movie so I was delighted and surprised by what I experienced!  What an incredible story of the relationship of Joy David Gresham and C.S. Lewis.  This was the North American premiers of the play - that has been playing in London --- I have not read the spiritual work of C.S. Lewis but I did read all the Tales of Narnia.  Many people say the Narnia was created by "Jack" early in his life when his mother died of cancer when he was eight years old.  The last time I picked up Narnia  as an adult was when I was with my Mother in the last 5 weeks of her life.  The stories were an incredible comfort and an escape and an inspiration.  So what about President Kennedy -  his assassination overshadowed the death of C.S. Lewis - and tha...

What a great image from Hubble Space Craft - I have felt the pull of the speed of light - days are packed with work meetings, time is filled with social and civic obligations, and weeks can easily fly by....lots of people are "busy".  How do I/we slow down - take in the moment, check the internal me - that which does connect to space - to the absolute stillness and presence of all of nothing?  The breath --- breathe breathe breathe, hear the heartbeat.  I knit a stitch, take up my needle, take steps with my feet as I sing out.   I have been saying "breathe through your feet" for decades,  I first heard or more accurately was asked firmly to "breath through your feet" by Peg West in the late 70's.  She was one of my early mentors,  a women who had a mountain in Alaska named for her, she was a fierce advocate for children, believing that a person (young or old) best knew when they did not feel safe - helped create ways for them to do something about it! ...

Sometimes it is a gift to just read and re-read and then read again words that have been spoken, have been written, and have been shared. I am sharing words from the Judy Chicago installation of the Dinner Party - reminding us of what it is that can be celebrated. The power of words, the power of images. All of us around a table all of us living in a way that honors the earth, honors each one of us. I have been busy, been pulled in many directions, distracted, and I was glad when someone sent along this piece from the Dinner Party. I was stopped, became present, enjoyed a moment of imagining, really taking in the words, the possibility. Great for this time of transition and thanksgiving! And then all that has divided us will merge And then compassion will be wedded with power And then softness will come to a world that is harsh and unkind And then both men and women will be gentle And then both women and men will be strong And then no person will be the subjected to another's will ...

I have made my first felted hat -- and  I figured out how to attach a picture - with my safari program and blogspot I'll post a picture.  I started with a sweather I felted (recycling) then I needle felted designs.  I is the funniest, laughable hat!  Looks like something a jester might wear, but I figure in a climate where you need a warm wool hat 7 months of the year, you might as well make people laugh!  I love it, and took an order today to make another one for a colleagues daughter!  I'm not quitting my day job, but I am having so much fun!  Another way in which I am transforming creatively....how fun, how deeply connecting, such connecting with heart and soul and fun and being!

Another morning where I am captivated by light, it is so pink in the eastern sky, with patches of the clearest blue, and as I type the golds and oranges begin to come forth from the horizon.  As I took a few breaths just took it all in, it all changed.  No grasping, no attachment, now the sky has a few bands of the faintest pink, then blue, almost colorless in contrast.  The trees do not one leaf on them, and I am now thinking of the horizon more like a November Sky when moments before I was transported and transfixed in the morning glory.   Oh, and it is cold outside 22 degrees.  I going to keep those glorious colors close by as I go through the day.

I had my first dinner with the Women Who Dine group - each of us having jobs and responsibilities that stretch and stress!  So how could we come together, have a way to relax and name out loud how to support each other and our work.  We talked about having big goals for our work.  One that we talked about was information that came from an Asst. Secretary in Department of Labor , he was talking about SSA projected deficits --- if 1% of SSA disability beneficiaries worked their way off of cash payments it would save $50 Billion - that is the same amount of money that is projected in the SSA budget in 2020 --- So why not support people working!  Great goal.  Great evening,  good food, fine company.

I have spent a delicious Sunday Morning at home.  There have been snowflakes falling and it grey (it is November!) and a cold that reminds me that winter is not YET here.  This morning I watched Sunday Morning on CBS -  I could not remember the last time I saw it, but I could remember sitting with Grampa and watching on Sunday mornings as my Gramma was making Breakfast for us all in the kitchen,  I loved the end when they show pictures in nature mostly I think, and then there is the sounds...they still do it at the end, and I still have the feeling like being in church.  As I watched this morning I started working on a new felt hat --- listening and watching and creating and remembering!  What an expansive way to just be present, with it all.  Then as the designs on the hat became more vibrant and beautiful I listening to Krista Tibbetts interviewing Studs Terkel.  I grew up just outside of Chicago, and moved there as soon as I could after high school!  Studs Terkel was always there, h...

Today I was with a small group of champions who are taking real steps to ensure that our expectations and actions support people with disabilities in  being a real and necessary part of Minnesota's workforce.  Supporting a vision to end the  barriers that support the inabilities versus the abilities of all people.  It is so exciting to hear people's passion and commitment to provide the support, the services, and the expectation that people with disabilities like any other group of people, want to work and receive the benefits of being in the workforce.  I had such a great time talking with young advocates who only know of the "deinstitution" of people with disabilities as a part of history, and they really see and know in their hearts and minds that people no longer need to be "exempted" from work --- but that people with disabilities want to work and it is time to support the full inclusion of people with disabilities in our communities including our workp...

I am still onto the light, this morning as I was standing by window looking out into the blackness of Lake Superior, a twinkling huge shape appeared. Bright white lights, like a big rectangle christmas tree - twinkling in the early morning pre-dawn. I watched as the ship moved along the lake, twinkling, moving north, out into the next great lake, and probably all the way to the ocean. We are not land locked here in the upper in midwest, we have ancient roots: water and light in guide us on the land.

This morning I woke early, it was so quiet, and the light coming from outside seemed so different.  The light at this time of the morning in November comes from street lights, alley lights, my decorative lights that go along the sidewalk from the house to the garage.  The sun is not up, not even as a type.  The silence of the early morning seemed different and the lights that I could see out the window was more diffuse.  I found myself walking out to see, to notice more of what I was feeling.  As I looked out into the backyard, there it was, a small blanket of snow.  I like snow, I live in a northern climate, if it is going to be cold, let there be snow.  Snow is such an insulator - it makes for such stillness.  No two snowflakes are alike, and these look like they were forged in windy, cold cold.  They are not big and fluffy, but small almost bead like snow is piled less than an inch in spots on my patio, and there are dark patches in the yard.  And it is quiet, a different vibration,...

I had an opportunity to read from the Dhammpada (Buddhist Text) this weekend, this passage resonated for me in reflecting where we are in this post election environment: Why is there laughter, Why merriment when this world is on fire? When you are living in darkness, Why don't you look for light?  

What a great weekend seminar, Passion, Play, Purpose and Presence -- lots of ways to explore how to be in the light, keep the spark alive, honor our souls, live life -- our own lives in the uniquely wonderful way in which we each do. It is a great gift to be in the circle, be open hearted, be me. So as we listened, and sang, and heard great stories I watched the snow fall, and the light shine through in the grey cloudy sky! It is November, and we are moving towards the darkness, and yet each of us was radianting. What keeps our light alive, where are the sparks, how do we nourish our dreams? What great questions, and what a gift to have time and space to sit with them. It is such a priviledge. I thought often this weekend about this blog, how good it feels to write, to share, to be unattached to how these words and questions and thoughts move through anyone else. I also thought about the intention, the native clarity of what we put in the world is there for at least seven gener...

Rosa Sat So Martin Could Walk Martin Walked So Barack Could Run Barack Ran So the Children Could Fly May we all soar!

I took an introduction to needle felting this evening --- it is so fun to do something that is so transformative.  I took loosely spun wool and made buttons!  Made a heart with wings pin to put on my coat and whatever!  And used a cookie cutter in the shape of Minnesota to create a holiday ornament for Jane the Sesquicentennial Queen!  How fun.  I brought home my pack of needles, some great yarn, and loads of possibility and creativity!  I love the pleasures of my hand crafting, each stitch is a prayer - felting is a moment of presence and attention, writing a poem a message of my soul!  Such moments of joy, plain and simple.

Last night as a spent the evening with a few good friends, I got calls from several of my friends in other states.  We all thanked Lonnie and cheered for the Pennsylvania victory.  Kathleen was an election judge in Wisconsin.  Karen and Jen called from Arizona, all of us shifting from deep joy and tears that reflected the magnitude of our feelings.  My daughter Sasha, keep calling throughout the night and as the victory for Obama was announced she was on the phone with me expressing her joy and being so very happy.   She was/is so engaged in this presidency, she has hope, and she believes in Obama as a leader, for her, for her family, for everyone.   What a difference from her lack of engagement the last 6 years, her complete defeat in the political landscape and reality.   This morning at 8 a.m. she called to tell me about what had happened this a.m.  Myah, age 8  and Luke age 6 were together in Luke's room shortly after getting up, Sasha walked in and asked them if they wanted to...

I am waiting for a few of my friends to show up - it is only in my circle of friends that people are coming to my house because I have the biggest TV -- my daughter would have a great laugh hearing that.  So we are going to watch returns, listen to NPR, and share our reactions, along with some good food and drink.  I think that tomorrow morning is going to come way to early.   I spent the afternoon doing my phone banking!  Late in the afternoon we stopped our get out the vote calls and switched to get out volunteers for door knocking!  Obama was polling very strong, but Franken and Colman are too close to call.  It is going to be a long night in the Senate race, and as I type it looks like Democratic Senators in North Carolina and New Hampshire.  And tomorrow we will know who our next President will be and start the process of how will I engage, what will the MN legislature look like, how will this impact my work on a state and national level.  Tonight I am going to breathe deep, and w...

It was about 70 degrees here today, yes that is 70 on November 3rd!  I burned up the phones again at the Obama Minneapolis Headquarters!  Today I used a computerized system, it keeps calling until you get a live voice, then all the info pops up on screen!  Very amazing, except I had 3 calls for people who were deceased ranging from 6 months ago (that is understandable) to eight years!  People were all and all very nice about the situation.  We still have a ways to go to really interface information!  My heart story of the night was getting people to vote for Al Franken - tonight people who were struggling really seemed to want to engage - I had some real, good stories about Al and Franni --- I hope that MN brings Al Franken to the Senate.  I have gotten calls from friends all over the country putting the heat on - we are doing our best.  The polls open in a little less than 11 hours from the time of this post.  Enjoy the Election Day --- it is going to be blue sky, sunny, and unseasona...

I spent the afternoon at the Obama Headquarters in NE Minneapolis doing phone banking, made over 200 calls.  Most where NO Answer, and we did not have to leave a message.  We helped people plan where, how, when they would go vote!  Perfect job for more as I am into visualizing these days, and most especially the outcome of this election.  Had a fun time sitting at my table, and watching people just come in one by one, in families, with the kids -- some volunteering, many picking up yard signs, everyone smiling, energy was upbeat.  Many of the people I talked to where for Obama, had to spend more time talking about Al Franken, but in the end I had very few hangups, just one cursing, and lots of great when I said I was a volunteer with the MN DFL.  Of course, some people don't know what DFL means, but today was not the day for that chapter of education.  Just as I was leaving my friend Cindy walked in for her shift, and we are working together on election day!  There was lots of food...

On Friday afternoon, after my roundtable was done, I took a walk up to the capitol and out onto the Mall.  There were parts of grounds near the capitol that were cordoned off - this was not homeland security, it was "preparing for the inauguration".  I stood and saw exactly where the next president will get sworn in, the sun was shining, the sky was brilliant blue, it was warm, there were green leaves on the trees, and I SAW Barack Obama right there.  Our President.   Today I went to vote,  there was a line, people were talking and easy about the wait.  I loved getting that ballot in my hand, it has been so long to be at this place - and I am so glad to have cast my vote.  I saved my "I voted" sticker so I can wear it on Tuesday be in comradeship with all the other people who will vote. Tomorrow I am doing phone banking.  Get out the vote.  Each day another step closer.  I am visualizing, I am doing what I can,  I am believing.  I have hope, and I have a vote.  It h...

I woke up to the radio talking about the superstition stories that are told about the "hauntings" in the capitol. One story has clapping heard in the empty senate chamber. Other's have statues moving, and conversations overheard. This is another day the ties us in such an old way to life and death, people and souls returning for the day. The spirits being unsettled, and what we did to try to appease and honor them. I read that Sweden does not "do" halloween, although they recognize All Saints Day starting on November 1st. I will miss my grandchildren's costumes although I am sure I will hear stories about their loot, and there will be many negotiations to have more than one piece of the candy at a time, and where all the candy will go and to whom! They have so much fun with their friends and the costumes (they are a surprise I don't know what they are, but they will put them on for me tomorrow!)...so we can all imagine our tricks and our treats....

There sure are alot of naysayers out here in D.C. They are feeling as if McCain will pull ahead. They are seeing many horrible attach ads on Barack Obama, I am glad we don't have to see them every 5 minutes of TV air time! My time with folks from around the US has been good, we are working hard to identify policy priorities and innovations. My room is lovely, the night sky is clear and I am off for political buttons tomorrow!

What a night! My very long time best friend Lonnie lives in Philly, and "she who never cared about sports" is a Philly fan, she knows stories about the players and just loves the team - amazing and now they won! One more team breaks the drought. Obama goes right to the people, and we hope the folks who were waiting for the World Series, just took a breath! And I am looking out of my corner hotel room windows on two sides of my room, and just soaking in how much I love our Capitol. It was in in 1987, when I was here for the Gay Lesbian March on Washington that I got this incredible clarity --- this is MY capitol, even if I am queer! This is my capitol, even if I opposed Vietnam, knew my country's leaders lied to me, no matter what this is my country. Whatever innoculation took place then it has never left. I never get tired of coming to Washingon, DC. I had great fun bringing my daughter and her friend to DC, I have smiled and beamed at the stories that my daught...

I am heading off to DC (unfortunately it doesn't seem like it will be much warmer there than here in MN) tomorrow.  I am participating in a round table with selected "thought leaders" discussing future policy direction regarding disability and employment.  I will see some of my professional friends from over the years, and I am sure some new faces.  I want to be passionate, clear in my purpose, creative and fully present for this experience.  I have been envisioning a world where we are all able to be honored and rewarded for contributions and abilities.  I want us to support each other in creating independence and acknowledging our need for interdependence.  I want to be clear who is profiting from what, and who is dependent on who as we identify how our structures help or create barriers for people to get the supports they need to participate fully.  So here's to moving forward and creating some discussion papers that I hope will inform and engage the new administra...

Tonight was the Annual Meeting of my local Food Co-op.  I have a long history with cooperatives.  When Sasha - 2 Year Old Daughter, Peg - Partner, and I moved to Madison, WI in 1976 -- we were about 2 blocks from the co-op.  It was  a one-room downstairs of a converted house, lots of bins, NO processed food, NO SUGAR, member owned and controlled.  A few years later the Co-op moved to a much bigger site, just as close to our home - Sasha and I volunteered on Sunday mornings for a couple of years.  It was something that we did together and she loved to put food on shelf and most especially to use the marking gun that put the price tag on the box/can/etc.  She loved it.  Over the years where ever I have lived, I have joined the Co-op -- I have lost track of how many memberships I have.  Lots... It is a way of life for me, this consciousness about my food, where it comes from, how it is produced, and the notion of being an owner - a part of the business.  Our Co-op is a little over 5 years...

Oh how I love the Bryant Lake Bowl (www.bryantlakebowl.com) - ,  it is a place where I have been over many years, with many different people.  It is the first place that my grandchildren went bowling, they thought all bowling alleys, served organic foods and they could get rice and veggies.  Today my friend Pat and I decided bowling would be a good way to start off the week!  We had both been doing fix up and other tasks around our homes and thought a few games in the late afternoon would be great fun.  Today has been one of those fall days that is a true reminded of what is to come in Minnesota.  The winds were howling early this morning, they woke me up,  there were strong gusts and it was predicted that the wind could be over 50 mph, that is some wind.  Mid-morning the winds were still blowing and it started to snow,  nothing stuck but it was the real thing - snow - October 26th.  It was a good day for staying inside, and I was feeling bad for the door knockers out there doing the ...

For the past week I have felt the closeness of today - the anniversary of the death of Paul Wellstone, his wife Sheila, his daughter Marcia, driver Will and staffers Tom and Mary.  I remember when Paul was first elected to the senate, I knew one of his staffers Bea -- and everytime I would travel to DC for business, I would stop by, sometimes with a purpose to discuss some policy or bill, but mostly what kept me coming was just a moment to say, have some soup in the senate cafeteria with friends, and enjoy the view watching as Paul and other staffers and whoever else would dash in and out of the office, down the hall, the elevator moments....Paul made me so glad to have him as my senator, and when I left MN - I still stopped in and was even more glad to have him be our senator for our country.   I was fortunate to just have a tiny glimpse and encounters with Paul Wellstone  personally, but what I was more fortunate to have, what we were more fortunate to have was him as a teacher, as a...

I got this great email earlier this week --- there are so many people that I know who are feeling stressed, "nuts", addicted to internet news about the ELECTION.  So here is a different kind of way to imagine life after Barack Obama is elected. Imagine it is 2014 and you are watching Obama on TV he is having one of his many press conferences.  H has been in office almost six years.  Things look much better than when he took office in January 2009.  While watching you remember how stressful and worried you were during the election campaign of 2008, and how engaged and energized you feel as you watch your president.   There have been set backs, and  much has been done to address global warming, health care, alternative energy sources have been developed and there is deeper feeling of interconnectedness across the planet.  You feel gratitude.    See it...Feel it...Breathe it....Pass it on. Here's a way to decrease our instincts to fight against McCain-Palin and work FOR Obam...

When we are so close to making a choice in President, in Congress, in our states and our communities - I have found it valuable to look back to clarify and remind us of what is important in going forward. I smiled and laughed when I found this quote: "We need women to be leaders, but we need them to have a vision for something." Charlotte Bunch, Feminist Author of "Passionate Politics Feminist Theory in Action"

The dark is staying longer in the morning, and beginning earlier in the evening.  It is the time where the veil between here and there is so thin.  My time on retreat allowed me time to be more still, to remember, to feel connection within myself and with my memories.  The darkness invites us into ourselves, a doorway within.    It is such a gift to remember that we can step away from all the politics, the negative ads, the stresses of work - and for a moment, a breath, maybe more - be still.  Listen.  

My retreat time was just right -- there were 12 women -- I was the only one who did not know anyone. A challenge for an introvert --- it was more than worth the effort. Wonderful honoring, exploring, opening to many aspects of the feminine in spirituality, earth honoring, matriarchy. The intersection of feminism in spirituality in the political - recognition of archtypes. Fun, stillness, going within, and reaching out. I think that many of us will find ourselves in another circle soon, and I may even have made some new friends that will be in my life in ways I cannot even imagine today. We all said goodbye around 11 a.m. today - and I headed up the road to Madison. Home of my heart. My friend Kathleen made my first feast of the day - a table set with such love and attention. We started off with a wonderful Champagne toast, then potato soup (She is Irish!), equisite cheese, chicken salad, and conversation that was deep, funny, connecting --- threads that get woven over decades of knowin...

I am sitting after a Friday Night Fish Fry - what else do you do when sitting on a lake in Wisconsin?  Well this is one of the things you could do.  This weekend I am on a retreat getaway.  15 women connecting around creativity, spirituality, music, breath....stepping out of our lives and taking a little time to recharge, listen, be.  In a few hours J ennifer Berezan  will be treating us to a really intimate concert.  I had heard of Jennifer years ago, mostly when at Michigan Womyn's Music Festival, and never really followed her music, and then my Spiritual Direction Mentor played me part of her Praises to the World CD...that was all it took.  Check her out, she is an accomplished singer/songwriter and in addition her spirituality is deeply apparent in her work.   So I am packing up my laptop, hopping in the car, driving the 2 miles down the road to another part of the lake, and going to rest up after a long drive across Wisconsin and oh so close to Illinois.   Illinois my home sta...

Maybe it is allergies,  maybe my defenses are down and I caught a cold, maybe I had one too many debates.  Whatever,  here I am with a big feeling head,  a plugged up nose,  itchy eyes, and sneezes.  Yuck.  This was exactly what I did not want to have happen, as I am continuing to heal from surgery.  The third day of cold weather, and my body just whimped out.  Thankfully I am going away tomorrow, for a weekend retreat in Wisconsin.  I am looking forward to seeing the colors as I drive south and east, and there will be lots of space during the weekend to rest and rejuvenate.  Hopefully when I wake up tomorrow I will feel better and not worse.  I am going to be with women I have never met before and would rather not be the walking germ factory!  Yuck.  Here's to snuggling in for a good nights sleep, and to being well.  

I have this favorite site where I can look at the predictions of the electoral college votes, remember George W Bush made it into the office without getting the populist vote, and everyone got a civics and judicial lesson in the process.  I started clicking on the site about three - four weeks ago - it was very close, but I liked looking at the "leaning" states, and was surprised at how the chart began to change.  From the vantage point of Electoral Vote  it is looking good, looks like it can will really happen.  Check out the site, and remember that it is the vote of the people that informs the Electoral College - and after last night debate (thankfully the last!) I not only can imagine Barack Obama as "presidential".  I, in every way possible welcome him as the President of the United States.  So now we each get the opportunity to do what we can, and to get ready, because the next President of the United States is not leaving you behind.  We are included in this p...

Almost two years ago I was on retreat, the focus of the retreat was about manifesting the divine in your daily life - making it real/concrete not just an abstraction or an image that someone else said the divine was. On the second day, Taj the leader of the retreat read to us a number of responses from children answering the question, "What is Love." A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think: "When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth." Billy - age 4 "Love is what makes you smile when you're tired." Terri - age 4 "Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen." Bobby - age 7 "Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still frien...

I want to share this video mosaic -- inspired by Barack Obama.  It left me smiling, wide hearted, crying, and most of all proud and inspired about us the people of America.  What we can do when we are supported inspired, appreciated, included, heard.  I hope you enjoy the video.  Here is the website:  www.dipdive.com/dip-politics/wato Pass it along. Today I started yoga classes again,  I am working with my teacher one-one for a few weeks.  She can help as she watches my habits, my challenges, checking out what takes too much effort.  Remembering to breathe.  Deep breath in,  longer stretched - out exhales.  It felt good.  The yoga a way to continue to honor healing, recuperation, being able to recognize a deeper within place.   So it seems to me, all of this, the dancing around singing Obama Obama, Obama -- stretching, breathing deeply.  All great qualities and skills for hope, for change, for all doing our part.     

Monday went by in a blur ---- and I came home ate supper and read --- I woke up with one end of the book making a dent on my cheek!  Monday was an all day meeting day, some productive, some not.  I am conscious of breathing in and out,  how to pull into my center and listen, curb my tendency to react.  What can I do to respond?   I also remembered by time at the Indian Mounds on Sunday.  It was a great day, the sun burst out fully a short time after our arrival --- and the birds.  Small ones, sprinting across the skies, a group that was flying gliders (one fashioned to look like a bird), and then the eagles.  They soar so effortlessly, there were 1-2-3 passes first one eagle, then two.   So today I am carrying those eagles within me as I do day 2 fulltime back to work.  Graceful, balanced, intentional, soaring......

I wrote this poem four years ago, when traveling to Salt Lake City, we left on the trip the day after Thankgiving.  We skirted ahead of several big storms,  it had been many, many years since I had driven that far west in what was already winter there.  I wanted to stop in Laramie, had thought that I would go to the place where Matthew Shepard died.  I did not go there, but he and his story and mine were intertwined throughout the trip and most especially in Laramie.   Laramie Part 1 Fence posts wind swept snow blue skies and mountain ranges that go  on and on. It is cold  and I wonder, how cold was it on that October night when they put Matthew Shepard  on a fence post? I watch the snow the curves and waves that are molded by the wind kept still in the sun and cold. I can see his face where the tears from his eyes washed away the blood as Matthew was left to cry while dying on a fence post. Part 2 There are fence posts everywhere along Interstate 80. They protect the travelers from th...

I was looking through the drawer in my desk earlier today.  I found two pieces of papers with quotes on them: 1.  "When Facism comes to America it will be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross".  Sinclair Lewis 2.  "There is not a step you can take that is not on your path".  Kate Behrens A reminder and a reminder! 

Finished the second week where I have arrived at work everyday!  This week was easier than last, and next week I am trying to be more "full time".  Each day lots of meetings, trying to sort out what it is that would really be helpful that I could provide.  Many days it feels like the game Jenga - this is a tower game where rectangle pieces are criss-crossed and you see which ones you can pull out without the tower falling down.  So far this week no towers fell as I tried to sort out ways to keep things moving.   The end of the week bonus was a trip to Stillwater - The Lift Bridge Brewery was holding their annual "Rise of Fall" beer tasting.  Dawn and I went (she is another beer lover) together - had a great time.  The Farm Girl Saison - --- mmmm mmmmm good.  The food was great, and I am waiting to get the call that I won one of the baskets!  The Okto a high test octoberfest was very tasty and pale ale's hopped - great.  I got a fun glass and a shirt and a great ...

I am recovering, the economy is not recovering, a friend is thinking about recovery.  First step, be willing.  Next show up.  Let go.  Be responsible for self.  That means continuing my supplements, rest, stay present, breath deep.  It has been 32 days since my surgery, a good reminder that there's still a lot of healing going on.  I haven't said thanks lately - I know that there are many of you reading this that are sending good energy, healing thoughts, love, and well wishes.  Thank You.  I am still soaking them up.  I am deeply moved by your care and love.  Hugs to you all.

I am sitting in my most favorite place, over a year ago I bought myself a chaise lounge - it is soft, and I love sitting with my legs up, and having snuggly blankets over me, and from my perch I can look out of the sliding doors in the back of the house.  I am looking east, and after a day of rain and gray -- the sun is brilliantly lighting up the wildly yellow gold leaves of trees on the next street over.  The leaves on that tree turned so quickly - and it is so full and yellow - just shimmering, shining, showing off in the most amazing ways and at the end of the day - it gets the last hoorah from the sun.  Isn't it great when we notice, can take a deep breath, and bring that beauty within ourselves.   So I am going to remember that tree when in a couple of hours I will be watching the presidential debate!  One month and we will know who our next President will be - hope it is a good night for Obama!  

Well I never got to knocking on doors yesterday.  I spent two hours napping, actually it was a rock solid sleep - clearly everything is working to make all well after surgery.  I also am experiencing the downside of the natural and artificial steroids leaving my body - they when in excess make you feel like you can leap tall buildings in a single bound.  How it manifested for me, was no wheezing, chest feeling open clear and not tight, and extra energy.  Now I just have to create my own set of chemical balance to garnish my energy and keep on healing!  I did go to see Patti Digh "Life is a Verb" - absolutely inspirational - she read, and told stories, and the whole point of her book, her blog, her life to really embrace our stories.  Write them share them live by them....even listening I was remembering priceless moments in my life - and what the story means, like the weekend at Great Grampa/Gramma Stanford (she was Emma, he was Andrew Jackson Stanford) they came to Illinois ...

I was sure when I was ending my day yesterday, that I had blogged earlier in the day.  What a surprise when I logged in this a.m.  and nothing for 10-4!   While I was not blogging, yesterday was a day for nesting.  I have finally finished my challenge to get the garage painted, it is brite white and looks good.  It is already getting a test of rain, and when I go to the garage later I'll find out if it is dry inside. The wonders of a new roof, little repairs, and sealed with primer and paint.  The good news about being home for a month is that I have had the time to pay attention to home.  As the days get cooler and leaves start to change my house is inviting me to settle in, enjoy the warmth, and honor my heart and soul.   For today I going to snuggle under some of my favorites blankets and enoy good reading and knitting.  I have my Obama Neighbor to Neighbor list and am going to knock on some doors in my neighborhood to talk with them about why I am voting for Barack Obama and as...

I made it through an entire work week, where I engaged in work every day.  That was a lot!  If I ever need surgery again I will take into account the political scene.  Surgery and a Presidential Election, and an economy that is imploding - that is a lot too.   The good news of the day, the "bail out bill" included the Wellstone Mental Health Parity Act.  Paul and Sheila fought for this for so long,  his sons continued for the past five years, and not only is this bill so significant for people who suffer from mental illness and addiction - it is a long overdue tribute to Paul Wellstone.  Oh how we all wish that he was here today.   I want to share a part of a poem that I wrote over four years: ...This is what Sheila believed, In what Paul fought for, What they lived together Wanting for each one of us to have  The time, take the space For dignity, For hope, For pride, A place, Community, Belonging.... This bill helps many of us to live our lives the way Paul so passionately s...

What a week, after two days of going into the office, on Wednesday I needed to just stay home, and really allow myself to rest, to sleep, and allow my body to just focus on healing.  Today I worked about 5 hours, and the good news was I had some energy when I walked to my car.  That was different than Monday and Tuesday where I was completely zapped as I headed to my car.  After work today, I headed out to the Dr. today was my 3 week follow up. I got a great report.  No thrush or fungus (sorry I know the thought is gross)!  Nose is good, deviated septum is not deviated and appears to be staying in its new place.  My throat is open, and the Dr. said that the opening is quite different and the surgery has accomplished what we wanted as on outcome.  There is still some areas of the throat that are still in early stages of healing, and he reminded me that lots of energy is going into my recovery.  The tingling on my throat is normal process of healing, I was told to not worry and stress ab...

Well, here is something I know after my second day back into the world of work.  Naps are essential.  After 4-5 hrs.  it is more than time to head back home and rest.  Had a massage this afternoon, and she worked many knots from the back of my neck.  I am a little noodle and glad that energy is flowing.  It's a good time to notice my energy,  look forward, and say goodnight.  

Well, I did it,  I went off to work at 9:30 this a.m. and was back home shortly after 2:30 and was napping by 3:15.  The enthusiasm, smiles, welcoming that I received was absolutely heart warming.  People were expressing how quickly the month had flown by, means folks were not have days where there wasn't much to do!  The staff I work with have done such an great job while I have been gone, and folks are feeling good about the work they are doing and the ways that it helps to support people with disabilities in their day to day lives.  What a wonderful thing to be so proud of the folks that you work with.  The care that I have felt is the same stuff they have for their colleagues and for the people of Minnesota.  Great Job PTE-DMIE-DLL --- you all know who you are!  People helped me to get out the door, I have a very good meeting with my Director at the end of my time, and as we were ending it was clear that the energy plug had been pulled and I was deflating quickly.  This means b...

I woke up this morning and it was still dark, and I laid in bed, thinking about my yesterday and noticing how my body felt, and then being a Type 6 in the Enneagram World - I found myself worrying about why I was waking up in the middle of the night.  I took a few breaths and decided to turn over and look at the clock.  It was 6 a.m.  -- amazing!  I was not reverting back to waking up numerous times in the night - I was awake because my body was ready to be awake!  So what does rested mean?  I got out the dictionary this morning to check it out. (adj) rested: not tired; refreshed as by sleeping or relaxing I am rested, and am beginning to have body memory of what refreshed means.  What a metaphor, as this part of world moves toward the dark, and a time of slumber and rest.  I am learning how to be rested  The mist and fog of the morning gently welcoming me into another day.

Today the garage roof was completed.  Those guys walked up and down the ladder and on the roof with such nimbleness, it was as if they were floating just above it all, and they swept the inside of the garage which had all the little brittle pieces of my very old old roof.  So now I am matched, and let's hope that Bob the painter arrives on Monday, and that my garage will be not only looking great, but ready for winter, and NO leaks inside!   I picked up Myah early this afternoon for an overnight stay, it was Luke's turn and he was ready to come, but his Mom was going to be at work all afternoon and evening, and he was ready for some Dad bonding time, so Myah says please could she come,  win win for me, for her, and for Luke.  When she got in the car I asked what did she think Luke and Dad would be doing today, and she said, " Oh, I think they are going to sit around in their underwear and watch TV tonight."  Clearly a guy thing!   And what do the gals do?  Myah tried ...

I have been exploring other blogs, as it has been several weeks for me - and outside of some white light pain days, I have managed to let something move through me, out my fingers, onto the keyboard and here it is!   Mark Siegel's blog is a great read,  The 19th Floor (I don't know how to hyperlink yet - so just google away!)  The 37 days,  a blog by Patti Digh--she just wrote a book about her blog called life is a verb.  Both these bloggers have a wry and wonderful sense of humor -- which I am hoping to improve upon for myself.   It is amazing that we have this whole way in which we communicate out there, and who knows who is reading this, its like pebbles in the water --- wonder what effect the ripples will have. I watched "the debate" with my friend Jane --- Obama's civility, his understanding of judgement, and his sense of how to be strategic, not forgetting what we are attempting to impact -- all pluses for me.  I am sure there will be much more said -- and n...